multimodal project revision

1. I feel like people living in Alabama is target audiences in this presentation. The author starts providing background information about stigmatization and bringing up his opinion which people should end stigmatization against person with mental illness. I like the tone in the presentation because it sounds logical enough to persuade people to stop stigmatization. 2. The topic is that stigmatization is a problem because it makes people with mental illness worse their disease. Then, the author argues his position on the topic which people should stop stigmatization against other people with mental illness. 3. It starts providing what stigmatization is and its negative effects on people with mental illness. Many information might help make people be aware of the issue, but it looks like it is too wordy. I think it can interrupt people to read. Also, I understand why we should stop stigmatization because of its negative effects to people with mental illness. However, I can barely see how it should be stopped. I think you should provide more specific solutions to the issue because just educating people is not enough to persuade your audiences. Compared to your pointing of why it should stop, it looks it is short to emphasize how it should be stopped. 4. The author uses reliable sources and put them in correct places to make the audiences reliable the authorâ€s position. Also, the author does in-text citations and reference slide although sources should be in alphabetical order in reference slide. 5. I am not sure if the colors have good effects to persuade the audience or not. It looks even scared to me to use red color and green color. I understand the purpose of using those colors, but it might not match to the topic. I suggest you to use bluish color because light blue color can easily imply mental issues. It should look calm and nice to be professional. 6. I like how you cite good sources in correct places to make the audiences better understand and put background information in the introduction to help people be aware of the issue. What I think you need to improve is to change visual design in a such way that you can change your background slides color or change font. Also, I think you should try to more focus on providing solutions to the issue instead of what the issue is. Other than that, I think the presentation looks good.

1. The author calls an action which stops stigmatization in Alabama. 2. The author’s position is against the stigmatization, the stigmatization is used to stigma from mental illness, and that is negative for patients, and people should stop that. 3. The author uses lots of words to talk about the negative aspects of the stigmatization, like what is stigmatization, what effects stigmatization would cause, and the cause of stigma. However, the author did not speak the solution about how should people instead of to the stigma, or how to stop it, the solution is not enough. 4. the author has enough references in his paper which show lots of information and data. And the cations are specific enough, these are good resources. 5. the background of the Powerpoint is a dark color, which shows people heavy, the color is good for readers to get the point. 6, I am really like the background of this project, and I think the author needs more solutions.


You have good feedback from both Inchan and Runze. I will suggest moving the cause slides before the effects slide. Also, in addition to saying why Alabama should stop stigmatization, you need to add how stigmatization can be stopped. What needs to be done? Also, add more visuals.

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